Mother of all Meetings! Hey Ram!

N Ram with The Stepmother (Chinnamma) of all Stepmothers!

Let me hazard a guess on what may have happened when The Hindu‘s N Ram met Sasikala at late Tamil Nadu Chief Minister Jayalalitha’s Poes Garden residence:

Ram: “Don’t worry, stepmother (chinnamma), the public may be seeing you as the Mother of all Evils in Tamil Nadu politics, but The Hindu will be solidly behind you. We had long lost our spine anyway to the DMK.”

Sasikala: (translated from Tamil as she is the antithesis of the big Amma she is accused of slow poisoning): Thank you. I want to see my photo on the cover page of your magazines, including SportsStar and Frontline. If you can publish photos of you falling at my feet in The Hindu, I will give you permanent access to my private room. I need your support in becoming the chief minister very soon.”


Ram: Not to worry. Jaya dreamt of becoming the PM some day. Since you succeeded in ejecting her out of her earthly abode, you can achieve what your Amma failed to. Modi needs you badly. When he becomes the President of China, I will use my contacts with the Communists to make you the PM.

Sasikala: I am getting bored with Poes Garden. I want to move to the Black House.

Ram: What?

Sasikala: The house occupied by the black man in Kushington.

Ram: Kusu (fart) what? Oh u mean the White House? Oh, Jesus! Hey Ram! Have you thought of the Blue House?

Sasikala: (in panic) No, no, I have never rented out blue films when I was running the video cassette shop before Amma came into my life.

This is what is called surrendering without summons.

Ram: I was referring to the Blue House in Seoul, the Korean Presidential palace. Like Jayalalitha and you, there too the President and her close Friend are in trouble for looting the country.

Sasikala: Let’s forget it. You are  white (points to his skin colour), I am white just like Amma, you must support me in establishing white rule here.

Ram gets up to say goodbye, looks around to see if anyone else is watching. Sensing there is none, he prostrates before Sasikala and says:”Varaen, Chinnamma (bye stepmom). Ask Natarajan to come and see me. I will make him the Chief Editor of The Hindu.”

Thank heavens, I am no longer with The Hindu.

G Joslin Vethakumar


1 Comment

Filed under Politics and the art of making money in India

One response to “Mother of all Meetings! Hey Ram!

  1. Pingback: Like Jallikattu, is Servility also a part of the Tamil Culture? | Top of the Word

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