Goon Carrier Airline of India

Some Suggestions for Crew and Passenger Safety

Let me begin with a disclaimer – I have nothing against Air India, the airline founded by JRD Tata that once belonged to the iconic conglomerate. Governments and politicians have completely destroyed its independence and effective functioning.

Now to the crux of the issue. Air India is referred to as the “Flag Carrier Airline of India”. I think the description can now be changed to “Goon Carrier Airline of India”.

Be warned, AI

It is also a Star Alliance member. All national carriers globally having the compulsion to entertain rogue Parliamentarians can now band together to form an appropriate entity so Air India call itself a Goon Alliance member.

  • I now wonder if Parliamentarian thugs go through normal security checks or if those belonging to the Shiv Sena (or any other party) are allowed to carry knives and guns into the Air India flight cabins.

Some Suggestions

Since the airline is expected to be a slave of Parliamentarians and all types of political thugs, here are some suggestions that Air India can consider implementing.

Bouncers

Since both the Government and the police will do nothing to defend the rights of airline staff or the common man they will at least have the satisfaction of sweet revenge.

AI-AI (Artificial Intelligence – Air India) Experience

Robots on flights

That will make Air India the first carrier in the world to introduce robots on flights.

Prime Minister Narendra Modi can then start bragging about how Air India is the first in the world to use digital personal assistants in the sky. Ha, that will be an AI-AI (Artificial Intelligence – Air India) Customer Experience (CX)!

Perhaps this MP who has come to be known as “goon” Gaikwad was miffed that he had to deal with a 60-year-old duty manager and not a young flight hostess. That may be why he blew his top!

Air India can have a warning notice prominently displayed stating that “Political Goons are on board, so please stay clear of them as they can hit you with slippers or with whatever they can lay their hands on.”

Politicians are the ones who have given Air India a bad name. I have travelled on Air India on a few occasions to India, including on Dreamliner. The experience has generally been positive, though once on a return flight back to Singapore we had to put up with a day’s delay. Such inconveniences can at times be inevitable with any airline.

G Joslin Vethakumar

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Filed under Air Travel, Indian Political Goons

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